The Final Moments

My mother just told me about something I find touching.

In her parish, there was a 91 y/o lady. She came down with pneumonia and had to go into the hospital last week. On Thursday or Friday, she suffered a mild heart attack. On Saturday, her family called in her priest. He came in and was with her, with family present, and spoke to her. She was all loopy on morphine, and he had to shake her a bit to wake her up and get her attention. He told her that the doctors said she was dying, and that he was going to give her last rites and say the prayers for the dying. 15 minutes after he did this and left, she passed away.

I find this an act of compassion and fortitude. For her and her family, religion meant a great deal. This priest making sure she heard the final prayers of her life probably gave her and her family some measure of comfort. I can only imagine what tending the dying is like, but I don't imagine doing what he did was easy. But how nice that he was able to do this for her, to help close the circle of her life (in Christianity from baptism to the last rites).

Knowing Why

I read another story of a baby dying in utero. "Cord compression." (what a nice, sanitary way of saying the baby hung herself by her own cord - reminds me of some ancient Greek story). Knowing why doesn't make it any better, it doesn't relieve the suffering (some babies apparently just stop living, with no explanation why). It doesn't change the past.

I wonder how much the why actually matters. If my baby girl died, would I care why? I'm inclined to think it wouldn't matter. No answer, no reason, no explanation would bring her back. She would be gone.

I'm almost afraid to have another child because I don't want that child to die. How silly! I'm afraid for a life that isn't even made yet! You can only do so much to keep them safe. Even if you take all the precautions possible, they could still be taken away. I don't think I could bear it.

Do opinions matter? I used to think of opinions as clouds in the sky. They can take any shape. They go whichever way the wind blows. They disappear very easily. They can be light, or dark, big or small. They can make the world dark and cold, or filter the sun so it's not quite as harsh. But we are always asking people for their opinion as if it is something concrete. Is it because of our need to enjoy being in the majority? If enough people share an opinion, does that make it right? Should rule of law be based, ever, on opinion? If not, how do you define right or wrong?

Opinions matter to the extent they establish a person's position, albeit temporarily. Trouble comes up when we expect that position to stay the same. But opinions are volitale. remember? I would expect a person to change their opinion in time, or as they learn new things (or forget old things). I hate being asked what I think of a person, because I only want to consider my experience, and if that doesn't match up with the majority, I have a problem. In my opinion, a person can only be judged by the experiences they have with you. Otherwise, you are basing opinion off of hearsay. Granted, in some cases that's not a bad idea. But is it right to allow our opinions to be shaped by those whose perspective is necessarily completely different?